Articles by John Sharry
My little girl keeps telling lies
Q: My six-year-old daughter often tells lies and I am wondering whether I should be worried about this. For example, the other day she had clearly helped herself to cake in the kitchen without permission. However, when I challenged her, she kept saying it wasn’t her. She definitely ate the cake as she even had icing around her mouth, yet she continued to deny it and eventually burst into tears and stormed off. I don’t mind her taking the cake – that is understandable and I should not have left it out to tempt her.
Helping Children with Friendships
Q. My nine-year-old daughter has been generally a happy girl but recently she has seemed to be unhappy going to school. She finally told me she had fallen out with her friend at school. I am not sure exactly what happened but it seems her friend has started hanging out more with another girl in the class and it has become a case of “three’s a crowd ”. She was very upset about it when she spoke to me.
Pocket Money: How much should I give?’
Q: My question is about how much pocket money you should give children. I have three children – an eight-year-old girl and two boys, six and five. The subject never really came up until recently and my daughter is now pressurising us to give her money like all her friends. Some of her friends seem to get lots of money from their parents which I don’t agree with. To be honest, I have always been unsure about giving a child pocket money in case they think they deserve it and it makes them more demanding.
I’m worried my teenager may be suicidal
Q. A 16-year-old boy in my son’s school took his own life a few months ago. This was a big tragedy in the school and the local area, and we were all upset about it. My son (also 16) was particularly upset on the day of the funeral. He spoke openly about how shocked he was and that nobody knew that the boy was depressed. I think collectively they were upset as a group. Now, three months on, my son does not talk much about what happened. Recently, he has become very closed off and I wonder if he is a bit down himself.
How should I discuss suicide with my children?
Q. The many suicides of young people in the media have made me really worried as a parent. I have two teenagers – a boy of 14 and a girl who is just 16. As far as I know they are doing well, with the usual ups and downs of the teenage years. But sometimes I worry if I could be missing something. How could I tell if they were in distress or even suicidal? I don’t want to be morbid but you read in the newspapers how frequently the suicide came out of the blue and the parents never suspected a thing.